Make WordPress return 200OKs instead of 503 (Internal Server Error)’s when in maintenance mode

When wordpress goes into “maintenance mode”, i.e. when it is updating itself or plugins/themes, it throws a page to the end user telling them it is updating. When it goes into this mode, it begins throwing HTTP Status Code 503’s (Internal Server Error). This is a huge problem for people running wordpress containers behind aContinue reading “Make WordPress return 200OKs instead of 503 (Internal Server Error)’s when in maintenance mode”

New Solids of Constant Width

When everyone’s special, no one is You’ve probably seen this video before. Aside from a 10-second gimmick, what benefit do these objects hold for us non-mathematicians? Why we use Wheels and Balls Spheres are nature’s preferred shape. When we need something to roll on, we think of wheels and balls. We have tried other shapes every soContinue reading “New Solids of Constant Width”

Trust is a Decision

A guide on “How to Trust” On the eve of Re:Inforce, I wanted to share my thoughts on how to trust, elaborating upon something I mentioned in a recent podcast. This post is as applicable socially as it is technologically. All of us struggle with trust to some extent. It is easy to know what youContinue reading “Trust is a Decision”

Can we just cut to Infrastructure-As-Declarative-Code?

The missing link between Declarative Infra and Infra-as-Code Everyone who is allured by the promise of Declarative Infrastructure, “declare what you want, and don’t worry how it happens”, eventually seems to end up at half-baked verbose clumsy templating. Nobody looks at 50 yaml files (with templates even) and can read a crisp declaration: this isContinue reading “Can we just cut to Infrastructure-As-Declarative-Code?”

Amazon is strip-mining Consultants, not Open Source

Software Development is a great business model; Software-installation never was If you’ve been following the latest incarnation of OSS licensing drama, you’ll see hints of the BLA (Bad Linux Advocacy) fervor of the late-90’s/early-2000’s, the OpenStack drama of the early 2010’s, and the Kubernetes drama being played out today. Like my therapist says about all myContinue reading “Amazon is strip-mining Consultants, not Open Source”

Semantic versioning has never versioned Semantics!

If you changed the sort() implementation from MergeSort to QuickSort, do you up the major version? My rants against SemVer are famous. Here’s a meta-rant: Semantic Versioning is broken at a higher level than what it does. It doesn’t version semantics (meaning, behavior, effect, outcome), but rather versions binding signatures (basically any linking, loading, IDE-calling, etc.Continue reading “Semantic versioning has never versioned Semantics!”

The Docless Manifesto

“undocumented” code is the new ideal Documentation is necessary. It’s essential. It’s valuable. For all its purported benefits though, even towards the end of 2018, it remains relegated to a stringly-typed escape-hatch to English, at best. Let’s dissect that problem statement below, but feel free to skip the section if you nodded in agreement. The Problem:Continue reading “The Docless Manifesto”

The SLA-Engineering Paradox

Why outcome-defined projects tend to drive more innovation than recipe-driven projects In the beginning, there was no Software Engineering. But as teams got distributed across the world, they needed to communicate what they wanted from each other and how they wanted it. Thus, Software Engineering was born and it was…. okay-ish. Everything ran over-budget, over-time,Continue reading “The SLA-Engineering Paradox”

You’re thinking about scale all wrong

Scale isn’t about large numbers To hear modern architects, system designers, consultants and inexperienced (but forgivable) developers talk about scale, you’d think every product and service was built to be the next Twitter or Facebook. Ironically, almost everything they create to be scalable would crash and burn if that actually happened. Even Google and Amazon aren’tContinue reading “You’re thinking about scale all wrong”

Threat Models Suck

They’re everything that’s wrong with cybersecurity The coffee I’m sipping right now could kill me. You think I jest; but I assure you, if you work backwards from “death”, there is a possible precondition for some very deadly coffee. I just brewed another pot. I survived it to the end of this post. I loveContinue reading “Threat Models Suck”